


You Can Never Go Home

by Writing_the_wrongs



Category: Fillmore!
Genre: Car Accidents, Crime, Drama, F/M, High School, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Implied/Referenced Underage Sex, Light Angst, M/M, Multi, Mystery, Non-Graphic Violence, Teenage Drama, Underage Drinking, ingrid is an 80's movie girl, safety patrol high-jinks
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-06
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-19 11:13:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29873778
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Writing_the_wrongs/pseuds/Writing_the_wrongs
Summary: One day, Ingrid didn't answer her phone. When Fillmore went to her house, it was completely abandoned. The Third family vanished in one night. No warning. No note. No goodbye. No one knew why. Only a strange message on his phone and an orange belt.Ten years later, Ingrid returns.
Relationships: Cornelius Fillmore & Ingrid Third, Cornelius Fillmore/Ingrid Third, background Joseph Anza/Karen Tehama
Kudos: 2





	You Can Never Go Home

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, welcome to my first Fillmore! story. I've never posted here before, and it's been a long time since I put any work online. 
> 
> I will be forever heartbroken that my favorite Safety Patrollers never got the ending they deserved,. This is an idea I've had for a long time, but I am going to finally attempt to write it. Chapters will jump between Ingrid's perspective 10 years after she vanished, and young Safety Patroller Cornelius Fillmore before his best friend disappeared.

“No home is forever.”  
-Baphomet, _Nightbreed_

High school was long ago, and they always told us that time changes people. But, sometimes, the moments that you felt the happiest? The moments that changed you and made you better? Those are the ones that remain. Unfortunately, with those moments that were the shiniest and best also came with the deepest of hurts. If you have perfect recollection, you never forget the pain of such a loss.

When someone must have an amputation, they feel phantom pains for a long time after losing their limb. Sometimes forever. When someone gives up pieces of themselves to others, losing them- severing them- may cause phantom pains of a different kind. And that was why she wanted to come back, even after everything. It was just that there were pieces of her left behind- and she wanted to see if she could find a few to make her feel more whole. To feel more like herself. Because Ingrid hadn’t felt like herself in ages. Old wounds still felt fresh and always stung when she tried to look at them, trying to believe that someday they would hurt less.

Her plan had been to wait until her black hair grew back in so she could feel like Ingrid Third again. She had been a redhead for so long, but it never felt *right* so she had been growing it, knowing that the time was near that she would be free again. With long hair dyed so much, she just wanted her hair to be healthy and shiny ebony again. But, with barely an inch of her roots had grown out, Ingrid had gotten restless.

It was at 12 AM when she decided to leave. Ingrid knew she wouldn’t be able to sleep anyway. Ingrid found herself dressed in a simple black outfit, packing up some clean clothes and stuffing them in a vintage suitcase. She snuck to the bathroom to grab toiletries when she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. 

She barely recognized the reflection. Ingrid brought her hand to the partly-washed-out cherry red hair, which looked especially light and orangey near her split ends. The inch of black hair at her roots was healthy and shiny but didn’t exactly compliment the rest of her rat’s nest. 

Ingrid crept back to her room, fishing a black beanie from her gothic vanity, and covered her head with it. Her orange split-end bangs stuck out like old broom bristles. She fiddled with them a little until she gave up, slipping a comb into her bag as well as a brush.

She planned on driving. Fourteen hours from New York to Minnesota by car and she figured that would give her ample time to figure out what to say. She grabbed her bag, heading down the hallway. She passed her father’s room, hearing his gentle snoring. It was good for him to sleep; she knew better than anyone how tired her family was. Ingrid wound around the hallway, turning a corner to see that the kitchen light was on. She paused before slipping into the lit room. 

Ariella was at the stove, stirring something in a pot and turned away from her. Ingrid cleared her throat, trying not to scare her sister, but Ariella jumped anyway. Whirling around, she instantly sobered seeing Ingrid, putting a hand over her heart.

“Ingrid, you startled me,” her eyes darted down to the bag Ingrid held, a knowing look passing over her face. “Are you going?”

Ingrid felt a little guilty, “Yeah, I need to.”

Ariella got a couple mugs from the cupboard, “Good thing I made enough cocoa for two, then.”

Ingrid wondered silently if Ariella had sensed Ingrid’s restlessness, “I actually wanted to-“

Ariella sat down at the table, putting a mug opposite her, “Come on, if you talk to me a little, you can go, I promise.”

Ingrid looked at the chair opposite her sister, her heart pounding. She was afraid of Ariella asking too many logical questions to ending the conversation with Ingrid’s hopes broken. For a moment, she thought about booking it to the door, but she sighed instead and sat at the seat. Ingrid glued her eyes into the mug, the hot chocolate’s foam reminding her of years past, remembering a girl with a smile that hadn’t been broken.

Ariella was quiet for the first few sips. Finally, she put her mug down, looking hard into her sister’s eyes. “Are you sure you want to go now?”

Ingrid took a drink, even though the cocoa was a little too hot and burned her mouth a little. Putting it down, she kept her gaze on the circle of chocolate in her mug. The whole time she felt Ariella’s sharp gaze steady, not giving even the slightest glimpse away from her sister.

Ingrid sighed, still not looking up. “Ariella, please don’t try to stop me.” She turned the mug in her hands, creating a small spiral of cocoa inside. “I need closure; you were in college and focused on your studies; I left-“ she cut off again, drinking more of the cocoa. Though it wasn’t too hot, she still felt the strange numbness and sensitivity in her mouth, “I let a lot of people down, and what’s worse is that I couldn’t even say goodbye.”

Ariella hadn’t taken a single sip until then. She swiveled her head, bringing the cup to her lips, staring out the window into the cold November night. After a thoughtful moment, she swallowed. “Okay. I knew you wanted to, but I don’t want you to get too many hopes up after so long.” Ariella took a few more drinks. Ingrid did, too, but she drank to satisfy her sister.

“I know, but I think it would help, nonetheless. It would at least be better to know than to remain in the dark forever,” Ingrid finished her drink, pushing it forward to signal to her sister that she was still going. 

“Sounds reasonable,” Ariella took two more gulps, finishing off her cocoa. 

Ingrid got up, picking her bag from the floor. She eyed Ariella, who grabbed both mugs, nodding gently. 

She put cups into the sink, “At least take some snacks for the road.” Ariella began sweeping through the kitchen, grabbing various things from the cupboards. Trail mix, apples, some candy bars with nuts, and a few of her daughter’s juice boxes and two water bottles. She did it so quickly that it reminded Ingrid how motherhood suited her sister, even though they hadn’t had one to teach her.

As Ingrid’s sister gathered the food for the lunchbox, Ingrid grabbed a black shoulder bag near the door and checked inside to make sure her laptop and all its accessories were in it. She shouldered it, also picking up her old suitcase.

Ariella pulled out a blue lunchbox that zipped shut. It actually surprised Ingrid how all of the snacks fit in, like a Tetris game. Ingrid slipped on her combat boots, not bothering to lace them up. Ariella slipped the lunchbox’s handle onto Ingrid’s hand, smiling softly.

“I hope you find what you’re looking for,” her voice was sad. Ingrid wondered if her sister pitied her: a smart, young woman chasing the dream of her teenage self. “I’ll let Dad know; call us when you get there. You have a place to stay?”

“I have a hotel room near our old neighborhood; I have it for a week. I’ll call.”

Ariella looked her sister up and down. “Do you have a coat?”

Ingrid nodded, smirking at Ariella’s motherly protectiveness, “Dad’s old leather one, I left it in the car.”

Ariella grabbed Ingrid, holding her in a tight embrace, “Be safe. I love you.”

Ingrid hugged her back. They separated, and Ingrid walked out, not looking back. She tossed her things into the back seat of her silver Corolla. Once in the driver’s seat, she felt a rush of anxiety. It was good that it was at least a seventeen-hour drive, because Ingrid needed to marinate on her thoughts and feelings. What was she going to try and do? What was she going to say? What could she say?

Ingrid turned key and the car started. Her stomach dropped, and she worried if what she was feeling was the excitement for a new start, or the anxiety of losing something she’d held onto forever.

**Author's Note:**

> Ah, yes, first chapter. Let's see how it goes. I have most of the plot points figured out, but we'll see how that works.  
> Kudos and Reviews make chapters go up faster.


End file.
